Paralyzed
by Peekabooo
Summary: Reid gets sick. He thinks it's just the normal stomach bug...But what happens when he collapses at work?
1. Chapter 1

**Peekabooo: Hey! Wow my title sucks! Ha, anyways. This was based off a story that my health teacher told me that happened to her son. it involves a bit of paralysis and is extremely rare. I instantly thought it would be a good story, and of course I made it about Reid...All my stories are about Reid...because he is just prone to accidents. It's a pretty interesting thing that is gonna happen to Reid in the next 1-3 chapters :) It is definitely going to take a lot of medical research but it's gonna be worth it :)**

**Please review! It would really mean the world to me :) **

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><p>Reid's phone buzzed on his nightstand, waking him up. He reached towards it and a text from Hotch lit up the screen.<p>

_Be in a little early. Child Case. 8:30._

Reid sighed. Child cases were never very fun for any of them, however he knew the urgency of it. So he sat up to get out of bed, but his stomach twisted into knots that were almost unbearable. He automatically laid back down and became still as a stone, hoping it would pass. The light from the window on the right side of his bed poured through and brightened the whole bedroom up, while also hurting Reid's eyes. Reid looked at the clock on his small bedside table. It was already 7:57. That meant that Reid had 33 minutes to get out of bed, shower, get dressed, refill is go-bag, get to the metro, and walk inside the BAU by 8:30.

Reid groaned as he attempted to sit up in bed again. The knots tightened and Reid felt the bile from his throat rise up. He swiftly hopped to his feet, his hand covering his mouth, and scurried over to his bathroom. He kneeled down in front of the porcelain toilet and he threw up. The mixture of food from the night before and acid came out, burning his nose and mouth mercilessly. Reid hated to throw up. It was one of the things he tried to avoid and prevent at all costs. So he counted, waiting for this grim beginning of his day to finally end. It went on for one minute and twenty-three seconds total. Afterwards Reid pulled himself up off of his bathroom's cold tile floor and walked unsteadily into his kitchen, already feeling a headache brewing inside of his head. He dare not eat anything, but drinking was okay right? Reid didn't want to risk it but he had to get the torturous burning sensation and the horrible acid taste out his mouth.

He desperately wanted coffee but he knew that was out of the question. So instead he gulped down a tall glass of water, but automatically regretted it afterwards. He got a little dizzy and sat down in one of his dining chairs. He didn't think he could stand in the shower, so he didn't take one. He just grabbed a brush and sat on the toilet, lid down, and brushed his hair. Afterwards he slipped into some dark slacks and put on a white shirt, then added a navy blue cardigan. He filled his to-go bag with a fresh change of clothes and then put on his dark sunglasses.

Reid really did not want to go to work that day, but he knew the team would worry if he didn't. And yeah, he was sick, but he had gone to work sick before. This would not be a big deal and he could make it through the day. Besides, he hated it when the team worried about him. He hated feeling like a baby. So Reid grabbed a small container of tums from his medicine cabinet, stuffed them in his bag, then headed out the door. His stomach churned as he walked slowly towards the metro. The ride was quick, but very loud. It was one of the busiest rides in the morning. But it only accentuated Reid's horrible morning when the ride got delayed due to the metro having issues. They technical problems went on for awhile and Reid had sighed multiple times before it finally went on. It was 8:38 when he reached the doors.

He shuffled into work very slowly, not trying to stir up anything inside him. He noticed that JJ and Emily weren't in the bullpen, and sighed. That meant that the team had already gathered to the round table. He walked as quickly as he could up towards the briefing room. As soon as he stepped inside, everyone's eyes turned towards him. He blushed slightly before he gruffly apologized and explained his problems on the metro, briefly.

"That's alright Reid. We haven't even started yet." Hotch reassured him.

"Oh good," Reid said, half out of it as Garcia walked in, handing everyone their tablets and Reid his standard file. Reid was grateful that the conversation had dropped.

"This is Melissa Adcock," A picture a little girl with Brown curly hair, green eyes bright with happiness showed up on the screen, "She was kidnapped two days ago from her home in Denver, Colorado. Last night the five year old's body was found in a school dumpster. And this morning six year old Kobi Johnson was not in her bed."

The next picture showed another girl with long brown hair, smiling happily and brightly into the camera. The two girls looked so much alike it was scary.

"He obviously has a type," Emily stated after seeing the pictures.

"Are there any witnesses?" Hotch asked.

"Notta," Garcia Said.

"Do the parents have anything that could be useful?" JJ queried.

"Not that I know of."

"Was there sexual assault on the first victim?" Morgan asked.

"The Coroner is still determining that," Garcia answered.

"Does the coroner know what the cause of death was?" Rossi questioned.

"Also still determining."

"There are bruises on her neck. It could have been strangulation," Emily examined.

"If there isn't any sexual abuse then it obviously isn't a sexual fantasy. Which probably means we don't have a pedophile on out hands." Morgan added, noticing that Reid was being unusually quiet.

"Alright everyone. Wheels up in twenty."

Reid sighed and got up from his seat, his stomach jolted and the acid was coming up from his throat. He managed to swallow the disgusting liquid back down, without anyone noticing his sickened face.

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><p>On the way to Colorado, Reid's stomach didn't feel much better. After the team had gone over the case one more time Reid attempted to sleep, hoping to escape from his miserable stomach ache and the acid that was stewing inside him. He had a massive headache, -which wasn't really unusual- his joints ached, he felt weak, and he was so tired, although he had gotten a good night's rest. After they had talked about the case even more and dismissed, The plane jolted and that was all Reid's stomach could take. He got up as soon ad he felt the acidic Vomit coming up his throat. He managed to make it into the bathroom in time, but not without gathering a few eyes.<p>

After two minutes and thirty four seconds of piling JJ knocked on the bathroom door.

"Spence? Are you alright?" She whispered. Reid was grateful that she hadn't broadcasted it, although everyone probably heard her.  
>As soon as Reid had finished he got up and unlocked the door.<p>

"Spence. You look awful."

"Gee. Thanks," Reid tried to laugh and put a lighter side to it.

"Were you throwing up this morning?" JJ questioned, going into mother mode.

"Yeah," Reid admitted after a moment.

"How did you feel last night?"

"Uh. Okay until dinner. I kind of felt unsettled after dinner."

"It's probably just the stomach flu," JJ said before feeling his forehead.

"You're burning up," JJ sighed.

"Sh! I don't want the whole team to know," Reid hushed his friend.

JJ laughed, feeling his forehead again.

"You should probably just rest the next day or two," she diagnosed.

"No. I'm working the case," Reid protested.

"If Hotch will let you."

"I can rest when the case is over," Reid stated.

JJ sighed and pushed the door open, and her and Reid walked out.

"What's wrong?" Hotch queried.

Reid glanced at JJ.

"Spence just has a little fever that's all," she lied, for her friend.

"Do you need to sit this one out?"

"No. I'm okay," Reid assured. He kind of felt relieved that they hadn't heard him throw up.

"Are you sure?" Hotch questioned hopefully, one more time.

"Of course. I'm fine," Reid said again.

"Okay. But don't push yourself. If you need a rest, please don't hesitate to speak up."

"Alright," Reid gave a small smile before sitting next to Morgan. Everyone went back to their own business. Well partially. Hotch kept stealing glances, as did Rossi and Emily. Morgan just looked at him, concern deep in his eyes.

"Kid. Nobody would think less of you if you rested at the hotel," he told the younger agent.

"On December 6, 2010 you had a cold while we were working a case in Oklahoma. You didn't take a break," Reid said, while looking out the window.

Morgan sighed as Reid used his own actions against him.

"Fine. But take it easy," Morgan exhaled.

Reid almost said, "Then stop treating me like such a baby."  
>But he knew Morgan was just worried about him.<p>

"Are you sure you're alright?" Emily asked, clearly worried about her friend.

"I'm fine. You don't have to worry about me so much," Reid laughed, looking back to the file.  
>As he pretended to Read it, Morgan glanced at Prentiss.<br>She mouthed, "Should we buy it?"  
>Morgan pursed his lips, then mouthed back, "We'll keep an eye on him."<p>

The plane landed and the team set off to work to find the missing girl and bring justice for the one who had passed on.

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><p>After two days of no sleep and working his butt off, Reid was leaning over the toilet- again.<p>

This had to have been the tenth time he had leaned over the porcelain god. He could not keep anything he ate in his stomach and he felt like he could lay down and take a nap anywhere. But Kobi Johnson was still missing and her life was far more important to him at the moment than some stupid stomach flu. The team had speculated she might already be dead, because the last girl had been killed in two days, but they still assumed she was alive.

Reid finally crawled off the Police Department's bathroom floor, his stomach empty, and washed his face and hands, all out of energy. He walked out of the bathroom and suddenly felt really dizzy. Purple spots started to cloud his vision and He barely made it to a chair before his legs gave out. He put his head in between his knees and inhaled and exhaled deeply. Emily and JJ walked through the double doors, back from interviewing a possible witness. That's when they saw him.

"Spence?" JJ exclaimed as she ran over to him, Emily close behind

.  
>Reid sat up, still very dizzy, and JJ felt his forehead again.<br>"He's even hotter than he was. Go ask the someone from the department if they have a first aid kit with a thermometer or something."

Emily immediately went to find someone.

"I'm fine," Reid mumbled, going to stand up, but JJ pushed him back into the chair, and Emily rushed back moments later, a small box in her hands.

"He said there should be one in here," she opened the kit and rummaged around before swiftly pulling out an electric thermometer. She handed it to JJ, who put it under Reid's tongue. Three seconds later she took it out.

"We need to get Him to a hospital." JJ gasped, as she read the temperature.

"What is it?" Emily asked, alarmed.

"His temperature is 103.6," JJ told her, "Call Hotch while I help Spence get to the car."

JJ helped Reid up and guided him outside to the car, while Emily dug her cell phone out of her pocket. She dialed Hotch's number and he answered on the first ring.

"What do you have Prentiss?" Hotch asked.

"We're taking Reid to the hospital."

"What? Why?" Hotch asked, shocked by this sudden announcement.

"Well we just got back from interviewing the possible witness -which was no help by the way- and we came back and he was sitting on a chair with his head between his knees. And he sat up and looked really out of it. JJ felt his forehead and it felt hot and I got a thermometer. His temperature was 103.6," Emily explained making her way out to the car.

"Okay. Uh. Call me once he's checked in," Hotch said, sighing as he hung up the phone.

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><p><strong>Peekabooo: To be continued..or not? <strong>

**D: I'm scared now..**


	2. Chapter 2

**Peekabooo: Woo! You guys are the best! I didn't expect so many of you to review/alert/faovirte this story! It's amazing! Now I have to go through and reply to all 32 reviews... Haha :) Please enjoy this next chapter, and REVIEW! It makes me so happy to hear your thoughts and opinions. Also, if you want to be/submit someone for this story DO IT! Because I suck at coming up with names. You guys are awesome! **

**Also, sorry for any mistakes made, I don't use a beta. **

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><p>"What's wrong?" Morgan asked as soon as Morgan had hung up the phone.<p>

"Reid's going to the hospital," Hotch sighed.

"What? Why?" Morgan Replied, loudly.

"His fever hit 103.6."

"Damn it," Morgan mumbled. Why did Reid have to work himself so hard? He poured his heart into every case, and although Morgan knew he was exhausted afterwards, Reid acted fine, and insisted on coming in early the next morning.

"He'll be fine, Morgan. He's with the people who can help him. We need to focus on the case," Hotch informed, sternly.

Morgan knew Hotch was right. So he reluctantly pushed any thought about Reid back into the deep corners of his mind and let then lay there until Kobi Johnson was found.

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><p>JJ drove the black SUV in the direction MaryView Medical center that was two miles away from the Police Station. Reid was in a feverish daze in the backseat, sitting slumped up against the window. His short brown hair was in a tangle and his eyes were closed, showing off his long eyelashes. His breathing was ragged and uneven, only making JJ feel worse she had told that little white lie to Hotch. She had made it seem that his illness wasn't as bad as it was. She should have told him Right then that he shouldn't work the case. But she hadn't, and now she had to pay the price.<p>

"Do you think he's going to be alright?" Emily whispered, glancing back at the backseat.

"I sure hope so," JJ sighed, running a hand through her hair as she stopped for the third red light.

"He doesnt look too good," Emily observed.

"Well," Came the breathless response from Reid. His voice was gruff and thick.  
>"What?" Emily asked, confused.<br>"I don't look too well," Reid corrected, his eyes still closed. The cold window felt good on his hot forehead.

"Just rest Spence," JJ sighed, smiling slightly at him.

"Mhm," Reid mumbled.

"We're almost there, Reid. Just hang in there," Emily stated, gently. Looking at the state her friend was in, she was glad she wasn't in his place.

They got to the hospital and assisted Reid in getting out of the car. He stumbled and was close to falling but Emily and JJ caught him before he could hit ground. They both lifted him up easily.

"Geez Reid. Have you eaten anything the past three months?" Emily slightly teased.

"Yes," Reid muttered, finally waking up a bit.

"What happened back there?" JJ questioned as they approached the doors.

"I haven't really kept anything I've eaten in my stomach. I tried to eat some chicken noodle soup at the station but it didn't help and I was throwing up and I felt so weak and i just felt like I was gonna pass out," Reid explained briefly as they walked Into the ER.  
>JJ explained the situation to the nurse at the front desk and then she helped Reid fill out his medical sheet.<p>

"JJ?" Reid got out once they had finished.

"Yeah Spence?"

"Don't let them give me any pain medication, or narcotics. No matter what. Okay?" He managed to remember, despite being tired out of his mind.

"Yeah, alright," JJ slightly smiled, glad she was finally able to trust her again. After Ian Doyle, she wasn't so sure.

JJ hurriedly gave the sheet to the person at the front desk and Reid was brought back into the back and put into a room. Reid sat in the bed and fell asleep after about five minutes. Twenty minutes later An old Doctor came in and looked at sleeping Reid sympathetically. He looked at the papers in his hands again and greeted the two female agents.

"Hello i'm Dr. Tedder. Sorry I've kept you waiting so long. I see that Mr. Reid has a fever? "

JJ explained the story once more to the doctor.

"Well he looks exhausted. Do you know if he was feeling sick before you came to Colorado?"

"The morning we flew out here he had started throwing up. He also felt a bit hot but I don't know the exact temperature," JJ informed Dr. Tedder.

"Well we'll just test his temperature again," The doctor stuck a thermometer in Reid's ear and pressed a button. Reid jolted awake and looked around, hazily.

"Spence you're fine. You're at the hospital," JJ explained to him calmly.

Reid still looked confused and he looked around anxiously.

"That's so weird," JJ whispered to Emily.

"Reid," Emily said louder, as the doctor's eyebrows pushed together in concern.

"His fever is up to 104.1," Dr. Tedder informed them, "I'm going to move him to a room so we can get his fever down."

JJ exhaled sadly. Reid just couldn't catch a break. He still looked very out of it, almost like he wasn't there.

Dr. Tedder grabbed a wheelchair that had been next to Reid's lumpy hospital bed.

"We'll help," Emily stood up, along with JJ.

"Thank you." Doctor Tedder allowed the two woman to step forward on the tile, towards Reid.

JJ stepped forward and then bent down to Reid's level, on the bed.

"Spence, you need to stand up. We're going to help you into a wheelchair, okay?" JJ spoke in a loud, but gentle and kind voice. She looked into his eyes for any kind of conformation, but there was none. Reid's eyes were glazed over and he looked slightly alarmed at everything.

"Reid?" Emily said, getting a little scared herself.

"Tobias?" Came Reid's small voice, his eyes squinting.  
>Shock shot through both Emily and JJ's slim forms. They both glanced at each other for a fraction of a second, then their eyes moved back to Reid.<p>

Emily spoke first. "Reid. It's me Emily."

"Tobias. I told you, I don't want it," Reid stated firmly, his voice gruff but the tone meant business.

"Reid. It's JJ and Emily. You're at the hospital," Emily spoke to Reid again, trying to get it through his head.

"He's halluncinating," JJ told Dr. Tedder.

"His fever is too high. We really need to get him to a room," The doctor informed them, quickly.  
>His callused hands reached out to Reid, but JJ stopped him.<p>

"I'll do it," She said. She was worried Reid might freak out if anyone else touched him, especially while he ass thinking about Tobias. Her feminine hands reached out and lifted him up by his hands. Reid stood up unsteadily and JJ guided him into the wheelchair.

"Don't touch me, Raphael," Reid murmured, quietly.

"You girls can wait in the waiting room. I'll have a nurse come and find you once his room is ready," Dr. Tedder, smiled at them warmly before wheeling Reid's wheelchair out of the room.

Emily and JJ walked down the white halls, their heels clacking on the tile as they slowly patterd towards the small waiting room on the other side of the 2nd floor in silence.

"That was weird," JJ finally said ad they sat down in the uncomfortable purple chairs.

"You think?" Emily laughed, tiredly.

"I'm surprised it was Tobias," JJ murmured quietly.

"Why?"

"Out of all the things his big brain could have come up with, it was Tobias. His worst nightmare."

"Oh, I'm sure it was just the fever," Emily attempted to console her friend, knowing that she still blamed herself for that.

"Yeah..but I always wonder of he still thinks about it."

"You can't live through something like that, without thinking about it sometimes," Emily sighed, thinking back on her own troubles. She definitely thought about Ian Doyle. Every morning when she changed she saw the scar.

"You should call Hotch. Tell him that Reid's getting checked in," JJ spoke up crossing her legs in the chair.

"Oh yeah. You're right," Emily nodded. She pulled out her cellphone and was about to dial Hotch's number.

The man across from him was pacing and the woman on her right side was holding the most obnoxious baby ever.

"I'll find a different place to talk," She informed JJ.

"Alright," JJ said, looking at her friend as he walked down the hall.

Emily turned the corner, and found a small corner.

She dialed Hotch's number quickly.

"Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner," He answered after the first ring.

"Hey Hotch, it's Emily."

"How is he?" Hotch's stoic stoned softened, just a tad, as he asked this question.

"Uh. His fever rose to 104.1, and he's exhausted," Emily stated.

"Are they checking him into a room?"

"Yeah. Right now actually. We're just waiting for them to be done."

"Good. But I really need on of you back here," Hotch informed her. With three people off the case at the moment they just weren't getting enough work done.

"I'll come back," Emily quickly said, automatically knowing JJ would want to stay with Reid.

"Alright," Hotch agreed.

"But..there's something else. It's nothing to really worry about but.." Emily sighed.

"What is it?" Hotch replied, a hint of worry slipping into his tone.

"Reid's fever was so high he started hallucinating. And it was about Tobias Hankel."  
>Emily could hear Hotch exhale deeply. There was a pause.<p>

"Just get here as fast as you can, okay? Kobi Johnson is still missing and we need to give the profile, " Hotch Uttered as he hung up the phone.  
>Emily looked at the phone, surprised, but she let it go. She found the way back and walked swiftly to the room her and JJ had been talking in.<p>

"JJ?" Emily poked her head in.

"Hm?" JJ asked, hardly looking up from the magazine she was 'reading' and her leg was bouncing up and down.

"Hotch wants one of us to go back and I volunteered. Call if anything happens. Or any changes are made. Okay?"

"Alright. Thanks Emily," JJ expressed her gratitude. She hated working child cases and she was so worried about Reid. Even after the deception and distrust Reid had felt after the Doyle situation, they were still best friends.

Emily smiled and left the premises, leaving JJ without a car. It's not like she would really need one, she was definitely not going anywhere until Reid was better. After about half an hour a short curly haired nurse came into the waiting room.

"Spencer Reid?" she called out, with a loud whisper.

"That's me," JJ stood up.

"Oh good. Follow me," the nurse smiled brightly and lead JJ past two halls and into a small room. The window was up against the far wall, letting then light shine through. A small green love-seat sat underneath the window and the hospital bed was in the middle. In front of the bed was a tv, a table, and two deep purple chairs.

JJ made a small gasp when she saw Reid sleeping in the uncomfortable bed. He looked so fragile underneath the thin, white hospital sheets. It didn't help that the hospital gown he was in drowned him. His hair was stuck to his face, which was shiny with a sheen of sweat.

"We think the fever broke. That's a good sign," The nurse smiled, and patted JJ's shoulder. JJ gave her a tight, fake smile, not taking her eyes off of Reid. She heard the light footsteps fade away and and the small nurse was gone. JJ pulled up a chair and sat bedside, just listening as Reid's soft snores filled the quiet room...

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><p>"How is he?" Morgan demanded, as soon as he saw Emily.<p>

"He's exhausted. Basically slept the whole time I was there," Emily Informed him briefly, leaving The bit about Tobias.

"What did the doctor say?" Morgan reworded his question.  
>"He moved Reid to another room after he discovered his body temperature was 104.1."<p>

"It's time to deliver the profile," Hotch interrupted them and the remaining team members filed out to the main room in the police station.

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><p>Reid awoke with a start, he was still confused. Was this real, or a dream? Surely he couldn't make this up, right?<p>

JJ was asleep in the chair next to him. And that was when Reid remembered that JJ and Emily had taken to the hospital.

"JJ?" He attempted to say, but a sound barely came out. Reid sat up and crossed his arms, frustrated.  
>He cleared his throat<p>

"JJ?" He croaked, the sound finally coming out.

JJ woke up immediately, alarmed. But then her face softened.

"Hey there sleepy head," she smiled, tiredly.

"I'm sorry," Reid told her. And he truly was. He got sick and now she had to sit with him in a boring hospital.

"Spence, you have nothing to be sorry for," JJ smiled another smile, this one looking more real.

"Yes I do. I was sick and I should have held it together. I'm sorry you have to sit with me. You should be working the case." he sighed, playing with his hands.

"Spence, it's fine. Besides Emily called A few hours ago and said they already have a suspect."

"That's great," Reid smiled, happily. His eyes started to droop again.

"Let me ask you this... What did I hallucinate about earlier? I only remember I did, and I couldn't tell what was real or not," Reid asked, curiously. He hated not being able to remember things. It almost made him feel blind.  
>JJ's face changed. It was only a slight change but it was enough for Reid to notice.<p>

"You need your rest," She patted his hand and leaned back in her chair.

He decided she was right. If he wanted to get out of here soon he better get his rest.

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><p><strong>TBC. <strong>

**I'm scared again...I hope I did okay.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Peekabooo: Hello! I have finally updated! Woo! :D It has been the holidays so I have not had much time to write. But I finally have! So yay! This chapter is a teeeeeny bit shorter but I think you'll like it. And guess what? My birthday was the 26th so I am now 14 years old! Leave me a review about the story as**** a present? **

**Thanks for all the reviews so far! It's awesome and it makes me feel great!**

**Hope you like it! **

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><p>"Alright Dr. Reid. Your temperature has gone down enough that you are able to go home. But it is still a little high. But honestly, this looks like a regular case of the stomach flu. You just need to rest for a couple of days at home. Keep hydrated. Then you'll be back to work in no time," Dr. Tedder smiled at the young genius and left the room.<p>

Reid was sitting on the bed in a cardigan and slacks. His hair was a bit messy, but he looked so much better than he had the previous day. But he still didn't feel like he was in tip-top shape. He had thrown up again that morning, and he had been been able to without alerting the nurses.

"They have a very good medical staff here. If not, I would have had to stay longer than one night," Reid informed JJ, who was sitting at the end of the bed.

"Mhm," she smiled, truly happy that her friend was feeling better.

Late last night the team had found the killer AND Kobi Johnson. The little girl was alive, but awfully scared.

"How is Kobi doing?" Reid asked JJ.

"Emily said she was doing great. She is just alarmed and in shock at what happened," JJ replied.

"I can imagine," Reid muttered.

JJ and Reid checked out of the hospital and left to go to the airport. The day before, the rest of the team had come to visit but Reid was sleeping and they decided he needed his rest. They left one car for him and JJ to drive to the airport in the next day.

There was very little conversation on the way to the airport. Just a little bit about the weather, the case, and the team. But they reached the airport in no time. They were 5 minutes late by the time they reached the plane, but the rest of the team didn't mind. They were exhausted and all got Into comfortable positions and relaxed. Morgan listening to his music, Emily reading a magazine, Rossi was eating an apple, looking out the window and JJ and Hotch sat across from eachother, resting. Everyone took note that as soon as Reid had layed his head down he was out, Snoring softly and moving every once in a while.

"What did the doctor say?" Hotch asked JJ who's eyes popped open.

She had deep circles under her eyes. "He just said it was the stomach flu and that Reid should take it easy for the next few days," JJ nodded.

"I'll make him take the week off," Hotch glanced at Reid who has flipped over onto his back, his body splayed out.

"Good luck with that," JJ snorted, "He's too stubborn."

"It will be forced upon him," Hotch grinned, a very small grin, then closed his eyes, resting his head on the seat.

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><p>Reid woke up groggily, an hour before the plane was scheduled to land. His face had a line across it from where he had rested his head on the seats, his hair was messy and sticking up at some odd angles, and his clothes were wrinkled and a tad bit sweaty.<p>

"Good morning sunshine," Morgan greeted with a chuckle

. "Good morning," Reid mumbled, sleepily.

Morgan laughed a bit more, happy that Reid was playing along. He seemed almost better.

"You slept a long time," Morgan informed him.

"How long?"

"About two hours," Morgan answered.

"I still feel tired," Reid groaned, sitting up.

"Well you were in the hospital. And you have the stomach flu," Morgan reminded him.

"I know. But I just slept for two hours. I shouldn't be so tired."

"Then you should go back to sleep, we still have about an hour left."

"I can't go back to sleep. I'm already awake," Reid sighed, heavily.

"How are you feeling?" Morgan asked, his voice trying to hide concern.

"A lot better," Reid answered truthfully.

"That's good," Morgan nodded. "Yeah," Reid replied quietly.

"Did they treat you alright?"

"Yeah...actually did you know that from their inception in Byzantium, hospitals evolved within a Christian religious framework of hospitality and charity, providing primarily shelter, food, and a good death with spiritual salvation. Often, medical services were marginal, contracted to deal with associated physical disabilities and pain. With poverty endemic by the late fifteenth century in many areas of Europe, the emphasis shifted away from broadly dispensed hospitality to the "poor of Jesus Christ." Charity was no longer conceived as either private or religious. With almsgiving dwindling because of wars and economic crises, social welfare needed to be reformed and rationed, a function increasingly delegated by the church to the contemporary secular powers."

"Actually you may find it hard to believe but I didn't know that," Morgan said sarcastically. Reid's face went a little red, embarrassed.

"Sorry," He apologized.

"It's alright Reid. I'm just glad to hear you are feeling better."

"Yeah. Feeling better," Reid said, as he looked out the window.

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><p>Much to everyone's surprise, Reid took the small vacation without a fight. He proceeded to get on the metro, get to his apartmen, change, then collapse on his bed. Despite his long nap on the plane he was still exhausted. He slept soundly through the day and the night, only to be woken up next morning by burning vomit coming up his throat. He threw up again and then laid back down on his bed. He just laid there, staring blankly at the ceiling, reciting an old book in his head. His lower back started to get sore, so Reid switched positions. He got up to go to the bathroom, But it only Made him have to throw up again. He repeated this twice, before deciding that just holding it was better. But it was hard just lying there. His back ached so badly he actually thought about calling JJ to come and help him. He decided against it.<p>

The hot smooth blankets on his bed were too much. He lifted them off of his legs and left the cool air to reach them. It felt so nice. Afterwards Reid became focused on making his breathing become steady and even. He sucked in the air that seemed so fresh and blew out all of the warm air from his system. He used breathing exercises he had learned to make his breathing become continuous. He felt so much better already.

Then the thought on his mind was food. He hadn't eaten since the hospital, and he was still throwing up. So he slowly put his bare feet on the hard wood floor of his bedroom and took baby steps towards the kitchen. He was careful not to make his stomach upset. He grabbed a tall glass from his cabinet and filled it with cold, clear water. He also got a pack of saltines then headed off to his room, slowly again. He was able to eat without throwing up again, but it was so hard. But his back hurt. It hurt really bad. And it was so weird because it had never happened to him before. Reid had to keep still, otherwise his stomach would churn and get upset. He basically laid still and slept for two days.

Eventually he knew that it was time he went back to the doctors for a follow up. This obviously wasn't just some stomach flu. So he called his regular doctor and made an appointment. Reid was absolutely sure that he was unable to drive or take the metro, so he called Morgan.

"Hey Reid, how are you feeling?" Morgan answered the phone after two rings.

"Oh I'm doing okay," Reid lied, knowing it was futile. He would have to tell Morgan about his predicament anyways.

"That's great!" Morgan enthused.

"Mhm," Reid mumbled, "But I need a favor."

"What is it? And can it be done from Oklahoma?" Morgan asked, chuckling at his own small joke slightly.

"What are you talking about?" Reid asked, wondering if this was some kind of pop culture references or something.

"We're in Oklahoma working a case, genius," Morgan briefly explained.

"Oh," Reid sighed quietly, "Well never mind then."

"What do you need?" Morgan asked, concern growing a bit.

"Oh it's nothing. Really Morgan," Reid amended.

"You can call Garcia. She'll take care of you," Morgan informed him.

"Oh it's okay," Reid insisted.

"You better call her. And you better bet that I'll figure out if you do or not."

"Fine. I'll call her," Reid sighed, wondering what Garcia would have in store for him.

"Bye prettyboy," Morgan laughed through the phone, curious about just what Reid wanted.

Usually, Reid would be a little upset that he missed a case. But with the weird symptoms and his back, he was actually glad he had missed this case. Reid hesitantly dialed Garcia's number.

"Well hello genius! It's nice to hear from you," Garcia answered the phone, much too perkily.

"Hi Garcia," Reid timidly greeted.

"What can I do for you boy-wonder?"

"I just need a..a tiny favor."

"And what would that be?" Garcia asked. Reid could hear the smile in her tone.

"Well I was just gonna do a follow up with my doctor about this whole flu thing but I don't feel up to taking the metro tomorrow."

"Still not feeling well, huh?" Garcia asked.

"Not really," Reid answered honestly this time.

"Well I would be delighted to take you! What time is the appointment at?"

"8:00 AM tomorrow."

"Well that is early. But I'll make it work. I'll pick you up at 7:30 ish?" Garcia chiperly asked.

"That's great. Thank you Garcia. Really."

"It's not a problem, at all." Garcia informed him happily.

"Bye," Reid quietly said.

"Get well soon, Reid," Garcia hung up the phone.

The next morning Reid got up at 6:30, deciding it would be a good idea to take a shower. He hadn't taken one for almost a week. Reid sighed sitting up and turning off his alarm. He walked slowly and quietly toward his bathroom, in a daze. Once he finally got there, he closed the door and turned on the shower. He sat on the toilet, waiting for the shower to get warm. Steam started to fill the air, making a fog in the bathroom. Reid shivered as he took off his pajamas. He put them in the dirty clothes hamper he had in the bathroom and stepped into the shower. Warm water hit his sore back and ran down the rest of his body. It soaked his hair down so pieces stuck to his face. Reid grabbed the soap and washed all the necessary spots. He was halfway through when clumps and spots of purple and black started to could his vision. Reid grabbed onto the wall for support. He scaled down the wall and sat on the ground of the shower for a moment. He felt so weak and tired. There was definitely something wrong with him and it wasn't just the flu.

Warm water kept coming from the shower head, washing over Reid. It sprayed down on his hair, running down his face. He lifted himself up slowly, grabbing the shampoo. He rubbed the fruit smelling liquid into his curly brown hair and let the steamy water rinse the suds down his drain. He repeated this with conditioner and then got out of the shower. The cold air embraced him and sent chills up his spine. He grabbed a fluffy white towel from his small bathroom closet. He hated how he felt so cold after the shower. Reid proceeded to get dressed and put on his shoes. He didn't feel like eating again so he just waited for Garcia to arrive

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><p><strong>Peekaboo: Sorry that last paragraph was kind of weird. I could not decide where to seperate it! Also sorry for any mistakes, I try really hard with catching them!<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Peekabooo: Hey guys! sorry this took so long. MY family actually lost the internet for awhile and Believe me it was scary times in our house. I updatd this one as soon as possible... I tried to make this chapter 2000 words too which took me longer than i had planned but i did it! Thanks for all the reviews/alerts/subscriptions! I really appreciate them and they keep me motivated. Keep them coming! :)**

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><p>Garcia knocked on Reid's brown wooden door loudly, her bracelets rattling as she did so. She heard a small crash and then footsteps coming from inside. A few seconds later the doorknob turned and there appeared a disheveled Reid, in a bright green cardigan and dark pants. His famous tan bag was slung over his shoulder.<p>

"Hi Garcia," He greeted, his voice gruff.

"Well hello boy wonder!" She replied happily, while surveying how he looked.

His hair was messy, hanging down on his forehead. His cardigan and pants were wrinkled, like he had just picked something from his dirty clothes hamper. He even looked skinnier than usual, and that was saying something because he was skinny in the first place and didn't have anything to lose.

"Thank you for doing this, really," Reid expressed his gratitude.

"It's no problem," Garcia assured him.

Reid stepped out and locked his door, then followed Garcia down to where her car was parked. He got in the eccentric car and attempted to relax. His stomach was still bitter and he hoped he would make it to the doctors without vomiting. He buckled his seatbelt and sat back.

"Have you been feeling any better?" Garcia asked, smiling brightly.

"A little bit," Reid gave a weary smile. He hated lying, especially to Garcia. But he didn't want her to tell Morgan who would tell Hotch and make Reid miss even more work. Reid had hated missing work since he had first started working. He would either miss a case and blame himself if more people died or he would get behind on his paperwork.

"That's good. Think you'll get any medicine?"

"Probably not. Usually the flu passes on it's own. And often it only last 24 hours. He could prescribe me some antiviral medication, which stops the virus from spreading. Although it's likely the virus has already spread by now," Reid explained.

"So no medication?" Garcia clarified.

"Probably not."

The rest of the way Garcia and Reid chitchatted about the team's case and the weather. They were almost there when Reid's stomach got really uneasy. He shifted in his seat and held his stomach tight, praying he wouldn't throw up. Garcia pulled into the large parking lot, and swung wildly into the first parking spot she saw. Reid was sure he was going to lose whatever was on his stomach. But he stumbled out of the car quick enough so he wouldn't do it in the car. He was facing away from Garcia when the revolting vile liquid rose in his throat, making his eyes water. "Reid are you alright?" Garcia asked.

_Hold it together_, Reid thought to himself. Much to Reid's disgust, he managed to swallow it down for Garcia's sake. He stood up straight, forcing a not-so-convincing smile on his face.

"I thought you were gonna leave," Reid stated, as Garcia got out of the car.

"No. I'm going in," Garcia told him firmly, but sweetly.  
>"Fine," Reid sighed, wanting to get this over with. He knew he couldn't argue with Garcia.<br>"Oh don't worry. I'll sit in the waiting room," Garcia smiled.

The two walked in the doors and The front desk was at their right. Two ladies in scrubs sat in rolling chairs, typing away.  
>"Hi. I'm Spencer Reid. I have an appoinment at 8:00." Reid muttered to the one closest to him.<p>

The gorgeous blonde looked up from the screen, her eyes piercing blue.  
>"Welcome Spencer. Are you seeing Dr. Martin today?"<p>

"No. Dr. Steffes," Reid corrected.

"Dr. Steffes isn't here today. He's on vacation. We have another doctor filling in. Dr. Herbert. Thanks for checking in. I'll let him know you're here," She smiled, her pearly whites glistening.

Reid nodded grimly and turned around to have a seat. Purple chairs and green chair were in a pattern. Reid saw 40 altogether. There were five doctors running the office, so there had to be a lot of chairs. The windows were like walls, letting the sunlight through and lighting up the big office. A playroom was in the other corner and the sound of small children screaming and laughing made Reid's head hurt. He was surprised that there was at least fifteen people here, not counting the kids. This was the first appointment of the day, and already people were there.

"This is a nice office," Garcia mused, as she took a seat next to Reid.

"I haven't been here for at least a year and a half." Reid muttered.

"Reid. You're supposed to get a checkup every 6 months." Garcia stated, matter of factly.

"You think our job allows that? I barely have time to go grocery shopping." Reid laughed, slightly.

"That is true," Garcia sighed. She felt bad for Reid. He worked himself hard and he hated himself if he didn't.

"Spencer Reid!" A petite woman with red hair called out, after walking out the door that led to the Doctor's rooms.  
>Reid got up, leaving Garcia with a little wave and he walked back to the back doors.<p>

Garcia pulled out her cell phone and dialed Morgan's number.

"Baby-Girl. I still have like half an hour left," he whined sleepily, ad he answered.

"Wake up sleepy head!" She laughed.

"No," Morgan muttered, becoming more lucid as time went on.

"I took Reid to the doctors today," Garcia let out, blunt.

"You what?" Morgan snapped out of his tired state.

"I didn't have time to tell you last night. He called and asked if I would give him a ride."

"Is he okay?" Morgan asked.

"He seems okay I think. He had an issue when we got here. He didn't look too good. But He said he was just doing a follow up," Garcia explained, "I was just letting you know in case you needed something for the case. But Reid said this wouldn't take long."

"That's good," Morgan mumbled, now knowing Reid was okay.

"But he looks like he's lost some weight. Which worries me because Reid doesn't really have anywhere to lose it from." Garcia admitted to him worriedly.

"He probably just hasn't been eating as much because he's been sick lately. I'm sure he'll pick right back up."

"I guess," Garcia sighed.

"Well since you woke me up I'm going to go take a shower," Morgan sighed.

"Have fun!" Garcia laughed as she hung up the phone.

"That doesn't make sense," Reid muttered, looking down at his feet.

"It's the only explanation I can give you," Dr. Herbert informed Reid.

"It can't just be the flu. I throw up practically everytime I move. I'm having trouble keeping everything down now. My back hurts and I can hardly stand upright."

"I'll tell you what. If you're still feeling sick a week from now come and see me."

"There's nothing else it could be?" Reid asked miserably.

"I'm afraid that's all it could be right now."

Reid got up from his chair, wobbly. He almost fell over after he had walked a few steps but he finally got his balance. He walked all the way back to the waiting room and back to Garcia who was reading a seventeen magazine.

"Ready to go?" she asked.

"I guess so," Reid replied bitterly. It couldn't just be the flu. It just couldn't.

Reid had gotten into his apartment without a problem. The doctor hadn't prescribed him anything, he had said just to let it pass. And the funny thing is Reid actually thought he was getting better. On the way back the windows were down, Garcia was playing some noisy pop music and the sun shined. He felt a lot better, but he decided it as Garcia. She could brighten anybody's day. She insisted she walk him back up to his apartment when they got back.

"Can I come in? I want to Dr. Reid's humble abode. The only people that I know have seen it is Morgan and JJ and they can't even explain it," she pleaded when Reid opened the door.

Reid wasn't to keen on the idea of anyone seeing his apartment right now, but Garcia had done a lot for him so he reluctantly let her in.

"Wow it's clean in here," She laughed.

"What? No it's not," Reid said surprised. This was the messiest his apartment had ever been.

"Well it's cleaner than mine. And if it weren't for all the books everywhere it would probably be cleaner."

"I don't have that many books," Reis defended himself quietly.

"There are four piles on top of your TV. And like five book cases from what I can see from the entry," Garcia retaliated.

"Fine. I have lots of books. I'm gonna go take a nap now," Reid sighed, suddenly feeling very tired.

"Okay. Get better boy genius," Garcia smiled and gave Reid a tight hug.

"Thanks Garcia," Reid said again.

"Anytime. Seriously," She smiled as she opened the thick wooden door, stepped out into the bright sunlight, and left.

Reid changed back into a black T-Shirt and gray sweats, then climbed back into bed. After taking a long nap, he threw up again. He was so sick of throwing up. That was basically all he had done during his time off. Sleep and throw up. He wanted to visit his mom or go to the library or hunt down a new coffee shop. But no. He had to be sick.

After bending over the toilet Reid just crumpled on the cold tile floor. He lay in the fetal-position playing with the hem of his black shirt. This reminded him of a long time ago, when he would lay in the exact position with his head on his mothers knees. She would stroke his curly brown hair and whisper soothing words to him. She would kiss him on the forehead and tell him everything would be alright. This was also when his father was still with them so when he came home he would take sleeping Reid from his mother's lap and lay him in his small comfortable bed. Those were warmer times. And Reid could almost feel the affectionate glow coming from his parents bodies as he thought back to memories with his eyes closed. But then he opened his eyes and the pleasant toasty feeling would slowly fade and just leave nausea and a bitter chill behind.

Reid eventually drifted off, laying on his bathroom floor. And he dreamt of the warmer times. Before his mother had gotten too bad, before his father had left, before Gideon had left, the nice times he spent with the team, when he would read to Henry, Laughing with Morgan.

But after the warmer times would seep away from his sleepy trance the darker times came and his toasty dream turned into a horrifying nightmare. Inside his dream felt like it dropped in temperature and he felt trapped and claustrophobic. Horrid visions and memories filled his dreams. Being bullied in high school, his mother freaking out and having episodes right in front of him, his father leaving, Gideon leaving, Tobias kidnapping him. So many horrible things flooded into his head at that moment and he couldn't stop them. He couldn't get himself to wake up. No matter how many times he cried out to wake up in his dream, Reid just couldn't. The memory that finally got him out of his ordeal was Tobias pulling out the sharp needle and dillaudid, and getting so close to injecting it...

Reid woke up shivering and covered in sweat. The sunlight from his bathroom window had disappeared only leaving the deep darkness, which fit Spencer's mood nicely. After repeating all his favorite memories followed by reliving all of his darkest and worst moments he had ever had really didn't lift his mood. And that dilaudid memory had really pushed him over the edge. He couldn't even will himself to get up from his fetal-position. He just laid there on the ground in the darkness.

Reid still had to live with his drug addiction everyday. Even though he was recovered he still had cravings whenever something reminded him of it or of Tobias. He had tried to push that memory to the back of his mind and sometimes he remembered brief parts of it which made him miserable. But reliving it in his dream was too much. Reid just slowly got up and grabbed a blanket from his room then he made his way back to the bathroom and laid back down.

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><p><strong>Peekabooo: That ending was kind of dark. I don't even know how it happened but it definitely did. Poor Reid :( But we're getting to the good parts!I'm so excited!<strong>

**P.S. That last Criminal Minds (Episode 11 of Season Seven 'True Genius') Was probably one of the best episodes of all time. That ending seen will go down in history! haha *SPOILER* Reid's smile made my heart melt...and Rossi kissing him on the cheek? D: So adorable!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Peekabooo: Hi! I'm finally back! I have been SO busy lately I feel like I haven't had time to sleep, let alone write anything. And when I finally started writing and I was SO close to being done, my phone got stolen and that's where I write all my chapters. I felt hopeless and like I couldn't even continue (But, then again, I was upset about the whole thing really and I was probally just being hormonal). But then I got it back! A girl in my dance class stole it and I suspected her from the beginning. I confronted her about it and I got it back! So then I finished writing it and now this is up! I really hope you enjoy it. Thanks for the reviews/alerts/subscriptions! They mean A LOT! And if you have ideas don't be afraid to share! I love getting ideas and/or requests! I'm trying to fulfill a request for an Emily and Reidscene in the next chapter. I'll try! Also,This is where the story starts to get juicy. This is also the chapter where Reid collapses, as promised in the summary. **

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><p>Reid straightened his tie, then put on his black vest and adjusted his light blue shirt accordingly. His pants were dark slacks and he wore his converse with them. After he was finished getting dressed he glanced in the mirror and sighed. Reid looked more worn out than ever.<p>

The usual dark circles under his eyes had darkened and his vest was practically falling off of him. He had only really eaten saltines and a bowl of soup over the past week so it was no surprise he had lost a bit of weight. Reid's hair was scraggly and curly, hanging down a bit. It was days like this that made him miss his shorter haircut.

He grabbed his tan bag off the chair in his living room. Today was the day he had to go back to work. The team had gotten back from the case in Oklahoma with terribly bad results. From what Morgan had said on the phone, the unsub had killed himself and the victim he had been holding hostage in the end. Reid hated those cases. He always felt as if he had failed everything and everyone.

Reid sighed and walked out the door to leave to go to work. The cold penetrated him immediately. It chilled him to he bone and it felt good on his skin.

The fever he was practically gone but other symptoms remained. Like the fact that he had already thrown up again that morning and his stomach felt uneasy almost every second, and his back felt like someone had literally stabbed him in the back and he was still walking around with the knife sticking out.

Reid was also unable focus his mind. He had taken a wrong turn down the road to get onto the metro and nearly missed it. Reid got on just in time. He sat in the first silver seat next to the door. But much to Reid's dismay a woman with a screaming baby had taken the seat next to crying baby was making his head throb. He prayed the ride would be over soon. And it was.

When Reid got to work he was earlier than everyone except Hotch, which was no surprise. No matter how early Reid got there, Hotch was there beffore. Sometimes Reid wondered if he ever went home. If he ever slept. Sometimes he even wondered if Hotch was some FBI robot or something.

Unphased, Reid sat down at his desk and looked at the paperwork on his desk. He really didn't want to do them but he got to work anyways.

It wasn't long until the rest of the team started to trickle in slowly. JJ came in first, all too happy to see Reid.

"Reid!" she vociferated, "We missed you!"

She pulled him out of his black rolly chair to give him a tight bear hug.

"I missed you guys too," Reid said, honestly as he hugged back.

"I hope you're feeling better," she stated, still squeezing him.  
>JJ let go, reluctantly and Reid plopped back into his chair, sweaty.<p>

"Yeah. I am actually," Reid said. taking a sip of his coffee to prove it. He hardly ever lied to JJ but if he ever had to, this was the time. The sip of coffee sunk down to the pit of his stomach, settling there bitterly.

JJ chit-chatted to him happily about small things. Henry, Will, the weather, the perfect flower arrangement. It pleased JJ that Reid would listen to her prattle on about frivolous things such as centerpieces. She was surprised that he didn't interrupt halfway through with some fact, like he usually does. He just nodded and smiled at her.  
>JJ decided he was just trying to be polite or he was suddenly glad just to actually listen to a conversation.<p>

Next to arrive was Morgan. He walked through the double doors into the bullpen. He was reading a file, not even glancing up. Reid had noticed he had a tendency to do that a lot.

JJ cleared her throat loudly and suddenly. Morgan looked up immediately, getting the hint. A bright white smile like up his face, making the corner of his eyes crinkle.

"Look who's back," Morgan chuckled, pleased.

"Yeah," Reid replied, a bit awkwardly.

"How do you feel?" Morgan queried.

"Better," Reid answered. Shortly after, he sighed knowing he would be answering this question all day long. Perhaps all week long.

Morgan patted Reid gently on the back just before tousling the younger agents curly brown locks.

Morgan poured himself a cup of coffee. "How did you spend your little vacation?"

Vomiting and sleeping, Reid wanted to answer.

"I read a lot and I watched some movies."

"I'm not even going to ask about that first one but what movies did you watch?" Morgan replied.

Reid said the first thing that popped into his head, "The Lion King."

JJ stifled a giggle and Morgan laughed out loud.

"What?" Reid said, "I like my Disney Classics."

"As do I, boy wonder," Garcia said as she stepped through the office doors. She smiled and walked over slowly. She proceeded to pull Reid into an extremely tight embrace.

"It's getting hard to breathe Garcia," Reid wheezed.

Garcia let go immediately, smiling, "Sorry."

"It's okay," Reid assured her as Morgan and JJ smirked behind their backs.

"I feel like I'm missing a great party," Emily walked into the BAU, followed by Rossi.

"Nothing to miss," Morgan laughed,"Just Prettyboy talking about his week."

"What I wouldn't do for a week off," Rossi muttered, making the rest of them chuckle.

"How many cups of coffee have you had today?" Emily asked Reid.

Again, Reid lied. "Only three."

"I think that might be a new record," Rossi said, once more making the team laugh.

"Actually, The world record for most coffee consumption is 82 cups of coffee in 7 hours. "

"I bet you could beat it," JJ informed him, while sitting down to do her paperwork.

"I don't drink THAT much coffee," Reid objected.

"Yeah. And Garcia doesn't use the computer, I doen't drink after hours, Morgan doesn't work out, Emily only speaks one language, JJ isn't a mom and Hotch isn't a tight ass," Rossi joked.

A second later, Hotch poked his head out of his office.

"I heard that, Dave," he smiled.

"Maybe he really isn't a tight ass," Morgan muttered.

After a little more conversation, the rest of the team strayed away to do their paperwork. Hotch, Morgan, Rossi, and Garcia went to their offices and Emily, Reid, and JJ stuck to their desks.

Reid was the fastest when it came to filling out paperwork. He could get almost all of it done in the first few hours of work, and afterwards he would help JJ and Emily with theirs or read. Sometimes he would browse the internet.

Today was no different. Reid had just finished the book he had gotten from the library. Although his stomach was bubbly and qualmish he got up to get another cup of coffee. Emily looked suspicious he had only refilled twice.

He walked over to the break room and grabbed the coffee pot. But as soon as he put his hands onto the coffee pot he felt so odd. He grabbed a cup anyways. The tips of his fingers began to feel tingly and soft. Most importantly, _numb._ The sensation began to ascend up his arms slowly, but surely. Reid silently panicked. It was the weirdest thing hed have ever felt. He just couldn't feel his arms. He could see them but it felt like they weren't there.

Reid heard the coffee pot and cup fall and break on the floor, But he couldn't move his arms. The numbness started to crawl up his legs and then his legs suddenly gave out and Reid was on the floor, unable to move anything. It had rose up to his neck quickly. Reid became terror-stricken. Was this what it felt like to be comepletely paralyzed? To not feel a thing? It was also amazing how fast all of this had happened and yet it felt like he had gone in slow motion. A few seconds had felt like a few hours.

"Spence!" JJ ran over to him in her black pumps.

"Reid! Are you alright?" Emily asked, obviously frightened.

The feeling began to fade. And it disappeared as soon as it had come.

Reid moved his arms and sat up. The whole team had come out of their offices, as well as every other member of the FBI on their floor, and they were all staring at him. Morgan, Rossi, and Hotch were hurrying over.

"I'm fine," Reid mutterd, looking down.

"No. I don't think you are," Morgan said as he kneeled down next to Reid.

"I am. I don't know what came over me. I'm sorry."

"Why do you apologize for everything?" Emily asked.

"I broke the coffee pot and the mug! I needed to apologize."

"Reid what happened?" Morgan asked while lifting Reid up.

"I don't know. I have no idea."

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><p><strong>Peekabooo: Ohhhhh! what's gonna happen? I know...kind of!<strong>

**Criminal Minds Musings: I loved all the episodes that aired in my brief break!**

**Snake Eyes was great! Seeing Morgan in a towel made my whole day better. And I absolutely LOVED when Reid went gambling and we learned he's banned from some casinos is Las Vegas.**

**Closing Time was awesome. I was surprised a best freiend would take that guys wife! man! And JJ was of course such a Bad-ass, although her fight seemed a bit forced. Hotch kissing Beth was sweet. I really like her (Sorry Hotly fans).**

**And last but not least, A Thin Line. It was just sad, really. Bur I loved it. I loved it when Reid and Emily were just standing in the different rooms, looking sad and horrified. It really shows that they're human . The trainging was great too. I wouldnt care if Morgan was yelling at me. He's hot when he's mad.  
><strong>**This episode is one of the few that freaked me out for some reason. I was getting up at around 3AM to pee and I walked out of the bathroom and heard a noise. I didnt turn my light off that night. **

**And that is the end! Review please!:)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Peekabooo: Hello guys! I'm really happy to finally update! Sprry I haven't updated in such a long time! Back at the start of March my dad was diagnosed with cancer. It's been a few very hard long months for my family and I. Last week he had surgery and they think it's finally gone! Yes! haha. He might have to do small amounts of radiation but everything looks okay now! It's really hard to deal with something like that with graduating 8th grade (woo!) and sports, and friends. I just could not find the energy and time to update and I apologize. Hopefully things are getting back to normal! I'm so happy and elated and I really wanted to get this chapter done and to 2000 words. Thanks for your ongoing support with my writing and all of my stories! I really appreciate it! Now please, read! I am eager to here what you all think.**

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><p>"Reid. You scared the hell out of me," Morgan said as he helped the younger man off the ground.<p>

I scared the hell out of myself, Reid thought.

"What happened?" JJ asked urgently. A worried look was plastered on all of the team members' faces.

Reid knew there was no lying himself out of this one.

"You don't look too good," Rossi observed.

"Are you alright?" Hotch asked, while simultaneously profiling Reid. Reid nodded in reply, obviously overwhelmed by his surroundings.

Reid's short hair was sticking up a little. His clothes were wrinkled, his face was as white as a ghost, the dark circles under his eyes suggested he hadn't slept in days. All of those symptoms in addition to the loss of weight and appetite, the nausea and vomiting...

Hotch had heard all of those in a list before...a very long time ago.  
>It was dark and rainy outside. Light barely drifted in through Hotch's office windows. It had been a case that hadn't ended well. Reid had been snappy. Much snappier than usual. Hotch put two fingers on the bridge of his nose. He shook his head, not wanting to believe the truth. But nevertheless, he typed the words 'dilaudid withdrawal' into the search engine. Every symptom on that list reflected right back onto Reid's behavior.<br>Reid was addicted.

Anger pulsed through Hotch presently. This wasn't the flu. Reid was having withdrawal symptoms. He had let this go once. He had thought Reid was going to be alright. Yet, after so many years, Reid still didn't know when to ask for help.

"Reid, can I speak with you in my office?" He tried to keep his tone even and the same, but the cracks of anger showed through. The rest of the team looked at each other curiously but Reid remained oblivious.

"Alright," he said evenly.

They both walked towards Hotch's office, the rest of the team's eyes following them. Hotch let Reid enter first, then he closed the door behind them.

He told Reid to take a seat, then, taking his own, said, "Reid. I'm going to get straight to the point. Are you using again?"

Shock flashed across Reid's face and his body-language automatically turned defensive.

"What? No!" he said loudly.

"Reid, I need to know if you're telling the truth. Because I can get you help. And if this is happening, I'm sure the whole team wants the same."

So many emotions burst inside Reid at the same time, giving him the oddest sensation. There was embarrassment, betrayal. But he could feel anger and hurt the most.

"Hotch..." His voice faltered. But that didn't stop him from sitting up straighter. He had fought the cravings for so long and he was only now getting accused of succumbing to them. All that hard work, not appreciated.

"Hotch, I can't even believe you would think that of me. I know my symptoms look a lot like withdrawal symptoms but I haven't taken dilaudid for 5 years, 6 months, and 4 days."

"Are you willing to take a drug test?" Hotch prodded him, testing him.

"My word isn't enough?" Reid asked, appalled and offended.

"The team cares so much for you. I care so much for you. We don't want to see you do that to yourself again."

"I've fought off the cravings and the memories for so long now, Hotch. It isn't fair that you're accusing me of this. Not after so much work I've put into fighting everything."

"Well, I can't have my agents shooting u-"

"Are we done here?" Reid asked, anger getting the best of him.

"The reason I'm asking these questions, Reid, is because we all care about you," Hotch all but yelled at him, repeating what he stated earlier.

"And I'm telling you. Withdrawal isn't it. I'm sick, Hotch. Do you want to know what happened out there? I couldn't feel my body! I don't know what's happening!"  
>Reid exploded.<p>

"What?" Hotch asked, as if Reid were crazy.

"I was going to go to the hospital after I was done here at work."

"Do you want one of us to take you now?" Hotch asked, hopeful.

"I'll take the metro," Reid replied coldly. "Can I go now?"

"Yes," Hotch conceded with a sigh. "But Reid. Please let one of us go with you," Hotch replied, ultimately regretting the stuff he had said and feeling like the biggest jerk in the world. But he had needed to know. He wanted to apologize but he knew it would do no good now.

Reid shook his head, "No, thank you," he said politely, hastily getting out of the chair and leaving Hotch's office. He angrily walked into the bullpen and grabbed his bag from his desk.

"Spence, what happened?" JJ asked.

"Reid, are you sure you're okay?" Emily queried.

Reid just kept walking, slinging his bag over his shoulder.

"Reid?" Morgan called out.

"Reid? Where are you going?" Rossi asked.

Reid fought the urge to turn around and ask one of them to take him.

No. He had to do this on his own.

Reid tore out of the BAU building and sat on a brown bench just outside. Who was Hotch to ask that? Who was he not to trust Reid?

Reid hadn't been this angry in a long time. But he felt bad for lying to Hotch. When he said he'd been clean for five years...that had been a lie.

Reid had relapsed once. The night of Emily's funeral.  
>Reid stumbled into his room, his face wet from tears. He collapsed onto his hands and knees next to his bed and blindly reached underneath. His hands searched over the carpet, until he found what he was looking for. He gripped the locked wooden box with both of his hands, which were now shaking uncontrollably. He carefully set the box on his bed and clumsily walked into the kitchen, his body numb from the knowledge of what he was finally doing. He pulled a chair in front of the corner cabinet and, climbing atop it, grabbed the dusty key that had been sitting there for years. He hopped to the floor and ran back to his bedroom. Grabbing the box, he sat on the ground, his back up against his bed. He pulled his knees and the box up close to him and ran his hands over the wooden lid. He couldn't will himself to open it. He just couldn't. He knew that, once he did, there was no stopping himself. For the whole day, grief had been holding onto his throat, choking him. And the cravings for dilaudid were as bad as ever. For the whole weekend, the cravings had overtook him. They were constant and they were almost the only thing he could think of. Reid shook his head and grabbed the key swiftly. He slowly stuck it into the slot and turned it. He heard the 'click' and he opened the box, not believing what he was doing. He swallowed loudly, a tear slipping down his cheek, looking at what was left of the two bottles he had taken from Tobias so long ago. He gripped the half-bottle of dilaudid and syringe in both of his hands, his long fingers curling around them both. He sat there, contemplating on his hardwood floor, and then, just like that...he gave in. He got up off his floor, grabbed a belt, and walked like a zombie towards the kitchen. He slumped into the wooden chair that was in his dining room. He rolled up his sleeve and belted his arm to the chair. And then he did it. He succumbed to dilaudid again after four years, three months, and seventeen days. He had failed everything and everyone. He had willed everything to go away. And everything had, for awhile, but when the dilaudid wore off and Reid woke up from his drug-induced haze, he experienced the worst feeling in his life.<br>As soon as he woke up, he freaked out, so disappointed at himself. He almost felt like Morgan when he hopped up onto the ground and banged his fist on the table, yelling in frustration. He shouldnt have done that. Dilaudid didn't last long enough. It didn't take all of his problems away. So why did he use it? Why did he have to force himself into that world again? In about seven hours, the withdrawal started. Even though he had been off the drug for so long, his body remembered how dependent he used to be on it. He had been hoping that he wouldn't have to go through it as badly, since he wasn't as heavily dependent as he had been once. But alas, the withdrawal started almost as bad as the last time. He climbed into his bed, with shaking tremors. He kept a blanket nearby because he often had hot and cold flashes. It hurt and it tortured him as he lie in his bed for a whole day, sweaty and shaking, knowing he had failed everyone. The whole team. Himself. Emily.  
>Emily.<br>He just laid there and suffered, writhing in guilt and pain. He had given into the cravings in order to get away from the pain.  
>After that, he started going to meetings again.<br>He knew he didn't look well, which was why he was really surprised when the team didn't notice anything. He went to work after the team had their weekend off. He was so cautious. He was nervous but he tried to control it. Much to Reid's surprise, nobody looked too closely. He was lucky. They were all fighting to survive their own grief and pain that they didn't notice Reid had drowned in his. He promised himself he would never let anybody know that he gave in. Ever. He could never be able to face any of the team again if they found out. He even hid it from JJ, who could usually read him like an open book, even before she had become a profiler. He felt guilty hiding it but that wasn't going to stop him.  
>After pondering his own thoughts, Reid stood up from his seat. He didn't have a car so he decided he would take the metro to the hospital. It wasn't ideal, but it would get him there and maybe then he would be able to figure out what the hell was going on.<p>

* * *

><p>Morgan burst into Hotch's office, the rest of the team following him. It suddenly got very cramped in there.<p>

"What the hell happened?" Morgan questioned, immediately.

"Spence just stormed out of here," JJ said.

"I...I asked Reid if he was using drugs again," Hotch got out.

"You can't just ask someone stuff like that," Morgan said.

"I'm his boss and a friend. I was concerned. I can ask whatever I want," Hotch replied stoically.

"I think we'd realize sooner if that happened," Rossi suggested.

"And he isn't snappy like he was," Emily pointed out.

"I'm sure the hospital would have figured out if it was...that, Hotch," JJ stated.

"Well, he's going there now," Hotch brought up.

"What?" Morgan queried.

"He said something scary happened out there and he said he needed to go to the hospital. I asked if he wanted anyone to give him a ride but he declined."

"Hotch!" JJ even exclaimed, starting to head out.

"He's probably outside now, JJ. It isn't any use," Morgan sighed. "And it's not Hotch's fault, either. He had every right to be worried about Reid. I'm worried, too. Reid's just stubborn like that."

The whole team sighed, almost simultaneously.

"We'll go and see him after work," Morgan said, and everyone else approved, nodding.

"He probably needs time to cool down," Rossi agreed.

* * *

><p><strong>Peekabooo: Well it was a tiny bit ooc for Reid and kind of Hotch but whatever. Haha. And It's always been a headcanon of ine that Reid relapsed that night. I'm really REALLY happy with that part. It almost makes me want to write a new story about what happened that night. Hey, who knows? Stay tuned!<strong>  
><strong>Please review!<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**Peekabooo: Hey guys! Sorry for the long wait! It's been busy and I had to find a beta! I have and she's awesome! Thanks SSAEmilyHotchner.**

**This chapter is twice as long as normal so I hope you enjoy :) Make sure to leave a review!:D**

* * *

><p>Sir. I already stated, only immediate family is allowed to see him at this time," the nurse replied, having dealt with this often.<p>

"And I already stated that we're basically his family. Now please, ma'am."

"I'm sorry, sir. I cannot let you see him," the irritating nurse said once more.

Morgan took deep breaths to keep himself from losing his temper and punching that smug little nurse in the face. He gave up with trying to reason with her and went and sat in the corner of the waiting room with the rest of the team.

Hotch shook his head, standing up.

"This is ridiculous," he murmured. He walked over to the receptionist and pulled his badge put of his pocket.

"Excuse me, ma'am. I'm Aaron Hotchner of the Behavioral Analysis unit in the FBI-"

"Your friend already tried that one, buddy," she snorted.

"He is a federal agent and part of this team. We need him. Now you grant permission to my team to see him or you're going to have to be explaining to your boss as to why my good friend Beckham Laury has withdrawn his donations to this hospital, and I can make that happen. And I will make it clear whose fault it is."

Hotch glared at her and she looked away immediately. Blackmail wasn't usually his first choice but...

The woman sighed, finally giving in. "Let me check with his doctor."

Hotch knew that would get her. Beckham Laury had been one of Hotch's good friends for a while and was the biggest donor to Maryview Medical Center.

Morgan smiled as he heard it. He gave a thumbs-up to the rest of the team, prompting Garcia to applaud and JJ to give a big smile. Morgan had been arguing with that snarky receptionist for over an hour. He was glad Hotch finally got through to her. Hotch walked over sat down next to the rest of them, in those stereotypically uncomfortable hospital chairs.

"The doctor will be here in a minute," he said.

Morgan felt a deja vu moment when they were waiting to see how he was about 5 years ago, all the way down in Georgia. Granted, they had been much more worried the last time, but it felt almost the same. Morgan thought back to that cold and horrible - but relieving - night.

The whole thing was over now. They had gotten Reid to the hospital okay, but now they were waiting. Waiting to see if any unrepairable damage had been done. Waiting to see what was going on. The last time they had seen Reid, he hadn't been in good shape. He had been shaking and sweating, blood caked to the side of his head. He could barely stand, even with help. The doctor came out and stated that Reid would make a full recovery. A wave of relief swallowed Morgan up. But that was before the doctor said that Reid was really sick. He was going through withdrawal. They had found dilaudid in his system. Morgan sucked in a breath. How could -

"Spencer Reid?" a handsome man in a white coat asked, snapping Morgan back into reality.

"Dr. Spencer Reid, actually," Garcia stated proudly, standing up with the rest of the team.

The handsome doctor smiled at her. "Ah, right. Dr. Spencer Reid. I forgot. Well, I'm Dr. Corrbridge.

"We're his coworkers and his friends...and basically his family," JJ replied, anxious to hear what was going on.

"Well, I take it you want to know what's happening?" he queried.

The whole team nodded, the suspense eating them alive.

"Please follow me to Dr. Reid's room."

A puzzled look briefly crossed Hotch's face. There wasn't anyone else in the waiting room. Why didn't he just tell them there?

The team followed Dr. Corrbridge down a long hallway and into the neurological section of the hospital. They stopped at room 321 and filed inside, Dr. Corrbridge last in line.

"Where's Reid?" Morgan asked, puzzled. Concern was already springing up deep inside him.

Dr. Corrbridge's expression turned solemn. "Dr. Reid is having an MRI right now."

"For what?" Emily questioned, though she was afraid to know the answer.

"I regret to inform you that we think that Dr. Reid may be suffering from an untreated brain tumor."

Shock pulsed through the whole team all at once. Garcia gasped, collapsing in a chair that was behind her, Rossi looked down and shook his head in disbelief, Prentiss covered her mouth with her hand. Morgan's jaw dropped and he buried his face in his hands, and Hotch put his fingers on the bridge of his nose, guilt shooting through him.

JJ choked back a sob, tears springing to her eyes in an instant. " Are you...are you sure?"

"Nothing is for sure yet, ma'am. But we're confident that it's the correct diagnosis," Dr. Corrbridge replied sadly. "The symptoms match. Headaches, unexplained nausea or vomiting, loss of movement for a brief period of time in an arm or a leg, numbness. According to Dr. Reid, he has experienced all of those, and all very recently."

JJ broke down into sobs, along with Garcia.

"Is it...treatable?" Morgan asked, attempting to be positive.

"Well, we think he has a malignant primary spinal cord glioma. These tumors are highly invasive and resistant to treatment with surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy. Usually, they barely respond to any treatment at all. But like I said before, we haven't seen a tumor yet. It could be a benign - non-cancerous - tumor. We don't know for sure; we just think he does. The symptoms match. So there is still a chance he doesn't have this tumor whatsoever. It's just a theory. I hate to upset you."

"No. We needed to know," JJ said, tears streaming down her face. Usually, she would try and be stronger about this but it was Spence. Her poor little Spence, all alone in the hospital, being told he has a serious medical problem...all alone.

More tears came.

"So if you're right, how long do you think he'll have?" Emily asked.

"Ma'am..I can't predict that without seeing the size and location and type of the tumor."

"If it's the kind that you think it is. A malignant whatever," Garcia prodded, a wreck.

The doctor pursed his lips, hesitating.

"How long?" Rossi persisted.

"If the tumor is average size and in the location where we suspect and no treatment works, I'd say six months. If the tumor does respond to some treatment at first, one to two years. Out of ten thousand people diagnosed with a malignant glioma each year, fifty percent are alive after a year and twenty-five percent are alive after two years," Dr. Corrbridge reluctantly answered.

"And if he doesn't have a brain tumor?" Hotch questioned.

"Then I have no idea what's wrong with him."

The team was still shocked as to what had happened.

"You can wait here. Dr. Reid should be back from his MRI very soon," Dr. Corrbridge informed the team, as they tried to process the news.

After a moment Hotch finally said, "Thank you Dr. Corrbridge."

The Doctor nodded and stepped out of the room, giving the team privacy, leaving them to their grief.

"I can't believe this," JJ sobbed as Garcia handed her a tissue from her purse, grabbing one for herself as well.

Morgan wanted to break down right there and weep. How could this have happened? Why didn't they notice sooner? He grit his teeth to keep the tears from forming in his eyes. "Guys. We need to be strong for Reid," Morgan stated, his voice breaking at Reid's name.

"He's right. Reid's going to try and put on a brave face for us." Hotch stated. He had to say something. He felt so guilty about the way he had treated Reid earlier. He shouldn't have crossed that line with him. But he had just needed to know. And now he knew something entirely worse had been happening.

"Okay," JJ exhaled, attempting to stop her heavy sobs. Garcia stopped after trying hard also.

"We don't even know for sure, yet," Rossi stated. "Everything could still turn out fine."

"What do we say to him?" Emily sighed, while soon after biting and picking at her nails.

"I don't even know," JJ shook her head.

Just then the door opened and Reid was rolled in the room sitting in a wheelchair and gown by a petite nurse with red hair. Neither of them looked at all surprised that the team was there.

Emily and Hotch moved out of their way and the nurse rolled Reid right up to the side of the bed. He struggled to stand and the nurse had to help him get on his feet and into the hospital bed. He climbed in and winced as he attempted to get under the covers.

"Are you sure you don't want any pain medication, Mr. Reid?"

"I'm positive, thank you," Reid replied, without thinking.

"Alright," she said disapprovingly. "The doctor will be here soon to check on you. We'll have your MRI results in the morning."

"Thank you," Reid expressed his gratitude again and the nurse turned and walked out, shutting the door loudly behind her. Reid sat up in bed, stretching his legs out.

The whole team, all together now, struggled for words as they all got the first good look at Reid. His face was ashen, even more so than when they had seen him that morning. His hair was messy and his expression was blank, but when you looked into his dark brown eyes, you could see that he was in pain.

"Hi, Reid," Garcia said, after a few moments of silence.

A memory flashed into Reid's mind. He was in Dr. Nichols lab, starting to sweat. Starting to feel sick. He was calling Garcia. She had said that in the exact same tone.

"What? No witty Garcia greeting for me?" he slightly smiled at the memory.

Garcia remembered too. "Well, I can't be my sparkly self when you are where you are."

Then it was silence.

Reid bit his lip the way he did when he was nervous. He knew that the team knew. The possibility he may be dead within half a year. "So I guess you guys know, huh?" he said, sadness filling his tone. He started to play with his hands. He hated putting them through a hard time, too.

"Reid. I'm so sorry," JJ said, a single tear running down her face. She grabbed one of his hands and he held it back, clenching on for dear life.

"JJ. It's okay. Don't cry. Please don't cry," he pleaded with her, all the sadness in the room overwhelming him.

Emily's heart broke watching this scene. Here Reid was, with a possible brain tumor, and he's telling them that it will be alright. Morgan and Hotch were right. He was trying to put on a brave face for them.

"Reid," Emily's voice cracked, "you don't have to put on a brave face for us."

"I'm not," Reid protested.

"She's right," Rossi agreed. "You don't have to hide your emotions in front of us."

"I'm not," Reid said once more. "I'm still hopeful. There's still a chance that I might not even have a -" He stopped and the team knew something was wrong by the way Reid's face paled. A shooting pain had shot up his spine. He slowly laid all the way down, straightening his back, waiting for it to pass. He gasped in pain and frustration and gripped the sheets in between one hand, and the other one gripping to JJ's tightly.

"Reid," Morgan cried, his voice frantic. "What's wrong?"

A sheen of sweat broke out on Reid's forehead as he struggled to gain his composure.

"I'm...fine.." He got out in between breaths and clenched teeth. "Happens...all the...time."

"We need the doctor!" Garcia squealed, frenzied.

As if on cue, Dr. Corrbridge ran in after hearing all the commotion. The team moved out of the way and the doctor made his way to Reid's bedside.

"Dr. Reid. If the pain becomes too much for you to handle, we're going to have to give you pain medication," he stated. Dr. Reid had already been through these back spasms and shooting pains while he had been there, at the hospital. Until they knew what was causing the pain, the only thing they could do was offer Reid pain medication; but Reid declined every time.

"No," Reid stated firmly. "I can handle it. It will be over soon."

Dr. Corrbridge shook his head disapprovingly. "Alright. If there is anything else we can do to make it more comfortable, please let us know. And if you change your mind, do the same."

Reid nodded and Dr. Corrbridge turned towards the team.

"You're not going to do anything about it?" Morgan asked angrily.

"Sir. There isn't anything we can do right now."

"Well, there has to be something!"

"Dr. Reid has refused pain medication and we applied ice earlier, but it had no effect," Dr. Corrbridge replied. "We should have the MRI results back tomorrow morning."

Hotch nodded in thanks and the doctor left the room. But Morgan was still fuming.

"Morgan. Calm down." Hotch put his hand on Morgan's shoulder and forced him to turn around towards him. "It's Reid's decision. The doctor has done everything else he can."

Morgan pursed his lips. He couldn't take the stifling room anymore. He walked out into the hallway and sat in one of the chairs that was next to Reid's room.

Using his hands, he concealed his face from the few passers by. Tears threatened to spill over. Seeing Reid like that...it was bad. This whole situation was bad. Why Reid? Why did it have to be Reid?

Why not me? he thought angrily.

After thinking a moment, he realized that the only thing he could do was be strong for Reid, for his friend. He stood up, immediately regretting the way he had acted. He strode back into the room, where Reid was still struggling. But the team was by his side, trying to make it bearable.

Morgan sat in one of the chairs in the room, at the bottom of Reid's bed.

"Hotch. Why don't you go home? To Jack?" Reid asked after the pain had eased a bit. "And you can go home to Henry, too, JJ."

"We aren't going anywhere, Reid," Hotch said firmly.

"Yeah. What he said," JJ flashed a small, sad smile at him.

"Nothing's going to happen overnight. If my results are coming tomorrow, you should all go home and get some rest."

"Reid. No matter how much you argue, I can guarantee that we are not going anywhere," Rossi stated.

"I can make arrangements for the team to get tomorrow off," Hotch said. Rossi nodded, satisfied. At that, Hotch stepped out the room. He dialed Strauss's number and explained the situation; and before he knew it, they had gotten at least the next day off. He then called Jess and told her he wouldn't be home tonight and maybe not even the next morning.

The team sat there for an hour, talking to Reid. Trying to support him the best they could. The pain had lessened and Reid relaxed.

"Hotch. I'm sorry about the way I acted today. My temper got the best of me and I apologize. You had every right to ask those questions and I should have seen that," Reid said after it had gotten quiet.

"Reid, you don't have to apologize. I could have found a better, nicer way to ask and I'm sorry, too," Hotch said, meaning every word.

"It's okay," Reid replied honestly. He was ashamed he had gotten so upset about it earlier. It wasn't like him.

A nurse popped her head in the door, informing Reid he should get some sleep.

"I think we should all get some sleep," Emily said.

"I concur," Rossi agreed, leaning back in his chair, closing his eyes. Morgan pulled his chair up to Reid's bedside on the left. The team didn't notice though. They were all too tired to think too much of it.

The team drifted off to sleep gradually, Reid within minutes. The only one who had a real trouble with it was Morgan. There was so much on his mind and so much that had happened within a few hours. He was supposed to call his mom but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He was so drained. Emotionally and physically. He prayed that they didn't suddenly get called away on a case. He knew Hotch had gotten them the day off but they had the day off on Haley's funeral and they still got called away. He couldn't take a case with the knowledge of what was happening with Reid at the same time. He sighed heavily.

After attempting - and failing- to go to sleep several more times, Morgan simply got on his phone and decided to play a few mindless games and browse the Internet. Two hours had passed when Morgan finally put his phone away. He slipped it in his pocket and crossed his arms, frustrated. He wished sleep would come. He needed this night to be over as fast as possible.

Suddenly, Reid started to stir. He groaned a bit in his sleep, Then he began to twist and turn. Morgan couldn't decide if he should wake him up or not, so it was a good thing when Reid jerked awake minutes later on his own.

Reid's eyes popped open in shock. Where was he now? What would happen here? He panicked inside, not knowing what could come next. He glanced to his right and saw JJ, fast asleep, then he turned to his left and saw Morgan staring at him with concern.

Then it hit him. That stuff had been a dream. A dream. That's it. It wasn't real.

Reid breathed a loud sigh of relief.

"Bad dream?" Morgan whispered, trying not to wake the rest of the team up. Reid only nodded. "Do you want to talk about it?" Morgan asked hopefully.

"Not really," Reid answered.

"Okay," Morgan replied. He knew it would do him no good at this point to argue. Neither of them knew what to say so the two sat in silence, the only sounds coming from the machines in the hospital and the soft snores from the team members in the room.

"So you blew up at Hotch today?" Morgan finally said. The incident had been gnawing at him since it happened. Hotch gave almost no details as to what was said, only a brief outline.

"Yeah. I feel bad about it now, though," Reid shook his head sadly. "My temper got the best of me." Reid evaluated all that had happened in seconds and thought back to the day before - had it really only been just under a day ago? So much had happened since then, it seemed like ages.

After Reid thought about it, he felt more and more guilty about lying to Hotch about his relapse. He wanted to tell somebody, anybody. But he couldn't get the words out.

"That's not usually like you," Morgan observed, thinking about Reid's temper. The team hardly saw it. There had been a few occasions but very rarely did Reid lose it.

"I know. That's - that's one of the symptoms of the tumor, you know. Change in behavior. It's an unconscious change. Nobody even realizes it's happening to them," Reid said, his voice small as he looked away.

Morgan stared at Reid. "You told everyone else you still had hope. But you don't, do you? You've practically diagnosed yourself," Morgan said in disbelief. Reid started to play with his hands again. "C'mon, Reid. Talk to me."

Reid sighed, giving up the act. He met Morgan's eyes. And that's when Morgan finally saw the fear. He hadn't seen it earlier. Not when Reid came into the room and not when the back pain had started or while they had been talking. All he had seen earlier was sadness and pain.

Now the fear in Reid's eyes was burning bright and Reid was not able to contain it.

"I hate seeing JJ and Garcia so upset. I hate seeing all of you so upset. I hate seeing people cry. I can't just say that all the symptoms fit. I can't tell you guys I have given up. I can't just blurt out the horrid statistics about the cure rate and the treatment options. I have to act like nothing is wrong. Otherwise, it would hurt you all even more."

Reid was right. It hurt Morgan more than anything to hear him say the words "I can't tell you guys I have given up", but at least it was the truth.

Morgan took a moment to collect himself before speaking, "Reid. I get where you're coming from. I do. But you lying to us about how you feel in this situation isn't helping you or us. Prentiss and Rossi both told you today that you don't have to put on a brave face for us, and that's the truth. We're all devastated. We all are. But we want you to tell us everything and tell us your thoughts, because right now, you are the most important. You are our top priority. You can talk to us. You know that, right?"

Reid twisted his sheets, looking at the rest of the team as they slept. "Of course I know. Everyone has made that very clear over the years. I just hate to make you guys disconcerted. And I hate seeing you all so upset because of me."

"It isn't because of you. It's the situation," Morgan corrected.

"That I caused," Reid added.

"Reid. Tell me how you really feel about this," Morgan poked, hoping to get even more out of him.

Reid looked up from his bed and straight ahead. He thought for a moment, his head tipping back a little. He bit his lip, thousands of words rushing through his head. He realized there was only one simple word that described every one of his feelings since he had found out.

"I'm scared, Morgan."

The words came out of his mouth so innocent and tiny. They could have easily been the words of a frightened child. It almost broke Morgan's heart hearing it. Morgan had to fight back tears. No, he couldn't get upset now.

The words hung in the air, playing back in Morgan's head twice, three times, a hundred times.

Morgan lifted his hand and put it on Reid's shoulder. "I am, too, kid," Morgan subsequently said, his voice weighed down with sadness. "You better go back to sleep," Morgan said after a few minutes of sitting in that same position. "Pretty boy needs his rest," he teased playfully.

Reid rolled his eyes, but nodded. Morgan took his hand off of Reid's shoulder and Reid sunk back down into the covers, laying on his side and facing Morgan.

"Thank you," Reid said.

"Anytime," Morgan smiled.

Reid closed his eyes and started to get hazy with sleep. But before he nodded off, he said, "You get some sleep, too, Morgan."

Morgan leaned his head back and closed his eyes.

And eventually, he fell asleep.

* * *

><p>The next morning came by swiftly. But waiting for the doctor was torture. The whole team was anxious to know the results of Reid's MRI. JJ had been pacing all morning and Prentiss had just about picked her whole nail off.<p>

Reid was quiet, though. His talk with Morgan the night before was echoing in his head.

At last Dr. Corrbridge entered Reid's room. "Hello," Dr. Corrbridge greeted the team. His tone was neutral and very hard to read.

"Hi, Dr. Corrbridge," Reid said back, anxiety almost overwhelming him.

"We have the results back," Dr. Corrbridge informed the room.

"And?" Hotch asked, antsy.

"The results came back-"

* * *

><p><strong>Peekabooo: I know I'm evil ;) some of you may already know the results. Some may not. You'll have to see in the next chapter because Reid is in for a wild ride.<strong>

**Thanks for reading! You guys are seriously the best! **


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